Brand Drop it Like It's Not

The most-viewed story on news giant CNN today currently is an interesting article about the rise and fall of the bubbly champagne Cristal. The drink, seemingly omnipresent in hip-hop over the last five years, may be at an end for popularity. Because those who produce Cristal, a French company that’s been around since 1776 (no word yet if they provided the celebratory toasting flutes for the American Revolution), recently said some things in the press concerning their popularity on the hip-hop circuit. Way to go, Frenchie. You pissed off Jay-Z.

Jay-Z (Sean Carter to some, Hova to others) has retired from the rap game. Aside from the occasional brilliant collaboration with Linkin Park, Jay-Z has earned his cred and now sits atop the industry as the CEO of Def Jam records at age 37. This is the equivalent of if Derek Jeter plays a few more years and then is immediately hired to be in charge of the Yankees. Yeah, when it came to his craft, Jay-Z was that good.

And now he calls the shots.

Jay-Z has called for a industry-wide boycott of Cristal, since their business isn’t welcome with the Louis Roederer champagne house. This means many things. He will no longer be carrying the drink that is in every MTV Cribs fridge in any of his club/lounge establishments. He is encouraging rappers to not mention it in songs. And most importantly, with Cristal removed from lyrics, people will stop confusing it with me.

You see friends, this is the exact reason you should strive to be famous and powerful in today’s world. If you have that level of fame in your particular field, people will listen to you. Imagine that I put more effort into blogging and bringing the funny, maybe even on an hourly basis. My readership would grow, and people who have never even met me would talk at the office’s water cooler saying things like:

Guy 1: Hey did you read what Condon said today about Tone Loc songs?
Guy 2: You’re a Tone Loc song.
Guy 1: Damn, you’ve got me there.

If I reached that level, I could pull off silly boycotts, and by the power of the e-press, I could affect consumer buying habits. Much more so than my recent underground campaign to avoid “Nacho Libre.” Trust me. It’s going to suck.

Anyways…

So how will we know if the hip-hop community will take Jay’s words to heart? Will his staffers sit by the radio and mark on a piece of paper every time a new song drops Cristal in the verse? Shouldn’t there be a middling marketing research firm that could do this and people would pay them for such a ridiculous assignment.

Of course there is! (Marketing majors know more than barbeques and Hawaiian shirts, Dilbert.)

Agenda Inc. is a firm responsible for tracking brand advertisements in popular music. For the past 4 years, they have released an annual list of the most oft-mentioned brands in music today. Cristal ranks 8th this year, behind rival Hennessey as well as luxury car leaders Mercedes, Bentley, Cadillac, and Rolls Royce, who nearly control the Top 5 (Nike is ranked #2.) I can understand many of these brands as items of material value and interest to those with cash trying to show it through their music. But looking a little farther down the list, there are some brands that I just don’t get. You tell me, which is weirder?

16th: Jell-O – 17 mentions
49th: Bisquick – 7 mentions
55th: Froot-Loops – 4 mentions