I used to hate watching NFL football on Sunday nights. There was a few reasons for this. First, the scheduling gods never put anyone all that riveting in the weekend nightcap slot. It was always a battle between two AFC West teams I could care less about or the Redskins getting a home game against an NFC patsy like the Cardinals, Vikings or Packers. Secondly, it came on opposite the Simpsons, a weekly ritual in college, that would not be missed for a game with a very tiny likelihood of playoff implications. And finally, and most importantly, ESPN’s Sunday Night Football coverage was announced by the worst NFL broadcast booth I have ever heard.
Mike Patrick. Paul Maguire. Sunshine Joe Theismann.
ESPN is not exactly a company that has a dearth of football minds on its payroll. Back in these days (2 yrs. ago), NFL Live’s desk was about 8 analysts long, and they even had a satellite desk in the back where they would throw it to Chris Mortensen for further breakdown of the Bucs’ Cover 2 defense. Surely, someone could have agreed to work nights and replace this horrible trio. Hell, you picked Theismann off from there in the first place!? Would it have been so hard to axe these turkeys and Steve Young, Kenny Mayne, and Tom Jackson in the booth?
Apparently so.
The Sunday night team kept me away from football in an era where I could have been watching my fantasy players make or break my week to come. There’s no greater example of these three’s incompetence than the playoff game two years ago between the Redskins and the Buccaneers in Tampa Bay. While Washington would leave with a victory, they left a parting gift with their opponents in the form of Sean Taylor spitting in the face of RB Michael Pittman. Of course, you wouldn’t know it by the call from the booth. Here is an outstanding recap of three guys getting paid to not pay attention to a football game on national TV.
Of course, I had great hopes for this broadcasting team’s demise during last year’s NFL TV Programming Musical Chairs exercise, and my dreams ALMOST came true.
- Patrick? Gone.
- Maguire? Gone.
- Theismann? PROMOTED. To Monday Night Football. Ack.
And so, even though we as a nation could return to watching football on Sunday nights, Mondays were decidedly in jeopardy. Look, I’m a big fan of Tony Kornheiser, and I was a fan of his addition to the broadcast booth. But like Studio 60, it was good material in the wrong format. Tony may grow to become a solid broadcaster in the booth, as he will be around to see this year’s slate of primetime weekday matchups. Joe Theismann? Not so much.
Pardon me while
While I didn’t watch much MNF this past year, what I did see involved Joe Theismann trying to get by on his good looks, always speaking in a condescending fashion to Kornheiser, and still not bringing quality analysis to the game.
Bye, bye Sunshine. Hello, Jaws.
Ron Jaworski, famous Philadelphia Eagle and the only QB that looks at more game film each week that Dancing Peyton, is getting the call. He excelled in the Week 1 MNF doubleheader, in which he, Dick Vermeil, and Brad Nessler carries the West Coast game. He’s currently practicing by calling games for the AFL. And most importantly, he’s not nearly as tan as Theismann, which will make Kornheiser look a lot less pasty.
What next? Randall Cunningham – Sideline Reporter?
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