We Be Dustin' Off Lyrics

Awhile back, the American Film Institute hit us with the 100 best original songs in American film. The greats were all there: Over the Rainbow, White Christmas, Stayin’ Alive, Mrs. Robinson – movies that become as well known for their music as they were their acting. In modern times, popular musicians will write and perform music not so much to make acclaimed lists such as these, but instead to have a crossover Top 40 hit that will be remembered as fondly as the film for which it was written. Don’t believe me?

Check out the collective late 90’s works of one Will Smith for further proof.

On many an occasion, the hip-hop community has risen to the challenge. Eminem provided new material for his flick, 8 Mile. The Ninja Turtle movies left us with several promising singles, none better than TURTLE Power by Partners in Kryme. However, this genre of music would not have been possible without RUN-DMC, and as you may have forgotten, they too had gotten in on the movie scoring game.

Kinda wish they hadn’t.

Early rap was nothing like it is now. It was a genre of style, of being completely different. It was the equivalent of dropping a show like The Office in the middle of 80’s TV, where family-centric situational comedy ruled the day. Of course, those who invent the game get to make the rules. RUN-DMC got to make the rules.But just because one gets to make the rules doesn’t mean they can’t be held accountable for their lyrics. With such a loose flow with simple rhyme schemes, this should have been an easy thing for them to accomplish. And in so many songs, they succeeded. In those songs, they were able to rap about anything they wanted – when no one’s rapped about anything before, you get to pen the first chapter in anyway you like. However, when given a specific assignment – say a movie tie-in rap – it looks like they struggled. A lot.

In our first edition of Lyrical Cynic in two and a half months, (last one here) we’re going after another song we actually like. A song we like inexplicably. A song crafted not for a movie soundtrack, but for a sequel. A song that decides a good place for the bridge is only 1:16 into the tune. Our first rap entry to LC, it has lyrics so laughable that it’s probably long forgotten in your memory. Lucky for you, we’re a steel trap.

Ghostbusters Rap, by RUN-DMC

It’s a catchy re-mix of Ray Parker Jr.’s ’84 hit, and it does well to highlight the call-and-answer style that these guys made so popular. But it, um, how do I – MAKES NO SENSE WHATSOEVER. A highlighted top eight lyrical train wrecks accompany below:

1. “Your heart fills with fright / not filled with the things / that go bump in the night!" - Ok, so we understand that the spooky confines of watching tv by yourself in the dark can be scary, but whatever it is that caused the fright, it was something OTHER than the things that go bump in the night. I give you the equivalent of a Navy Seal that's afraid of a mouse.

2. "All alone on the phone / so whassup with that noise / ... / so you get up and call" - Even in music about movies, it appears continuity errors can occur. This is a common editing mistake. A guy's on the phone and then two lines in the lap later, he gets on the phone again. Brilliant.

3. "Kids at school and I'm no fool and I got no time to waste / So you get up and call, don't trip and fall / Go outside and leave the place / Now it's no dream because you seein' a shadow in the night" - The kids attend night school? What, they're holding down jobs during the day?

4. "They be dustin' off ghosts / like true ghost dusters" - Worst rhyme ever. But then again, maybe DMC's kids' jobs are in this previously unheard of industry. (Note: only true ghost dusters need apply. Accept no substitutes.)

NOTE: The rest comes from the final verse, or how I like to call it, the NYNEX Phone-It-In Special.

5. "I remember the time, I visited the grave / My life on the line, only my life to save" - I'm all for paying respects to the dearly departed, but if my life needs saving as a result, next time I'll just say a little prayer at church. STOP GOING THERE.

6. "All by myself, with no one around / Did not understand a hand comin' out the ground" - While I personally enjoy the "comin' out the" section in the name of syllabic sacrifice, I've got to give him credit for overstatement of the year. Can't say a hand breaking through the earth is a largely understandable occurence. That brings us to the next line...

7. "I knew it wasn't mine / it was somebody else." - I take that back. This is the overstatement of the year.

8. "We are your friendly neighborhood ghostbusters," / that's what they said to me" / We are the busters of any, G-H-O-S-T." - Damn it, the Ghostbusters listen to Fergie. And in effort to save some time, let's be glad they didn't name their crew Supernatural Appartition Busters.