Despite the long-running roots of The Real World and the astounding staying power of perennial hit Survivor, at this point in the history of reality television the crown must be placed upon the ratings juggernaut American Idol. Now it its fifth season, the Fox hit smacks down Nielsen and his coveted ratings with a strong 1-2 punch. If nothing else, at least it helped launch follow-up House to stardom. (which features the kid who played Neil in Dead Poets Society. Didn’t he commit suicide in that movie to avoid his father’s wishes of become a doctor? Did something go terribly wrong here?)
But back to American Idol. I’ll admit, I’ve caught my share of episodes, or at lease small portions and performances. I’ll only watch when they are down to 10 or less contestants. Those early auditions where people are terrible? No thanks. If I wanted to witness a trainwreck, I’d scare Sara at work and see what goes awry.
Here’s my quick-hit Idol thoughts on a slow news Friday:
- What Simon says, goes. Nevermind the overly caustic judge who flanks Paula Abdul, I’m talking about the whole thing. According to production lists, American Idol is based on a creation of Simon Cowell, Simon Fuller, and Simon Jones. Three Simons, working together without any input from other people not names Simon. Doesn’t this seem odd? I understand that Simon is a popular British name, but such a collaboration is just the product of a childhood directions game gone horribly wrong. I suppose if the game was Condon Says, I’d have a massive ego, too. (It should also be noted that Simon Lythgoe is one of the show’s three directors.) If nepotism is showing favoritism to family, what is this? Nomenism?
- There have been four winners to date, and only really one has had a superstar career to date. Kelly Clarkson has been a tremendous story, but what has happened to Ruben Studdard? Since his solo career has struggled, why not pro football? I would love to see the ESPN guys slip his name on-air to Mel Kiper Jr., and see if the Draft Mahatma can come up with some tape or analysis. Fantasia Barrino, while having a voice resembling nails on a boardwalk, has reportedly agreed to star in a Lifetime Original Movie about her life. No word on whether the ballet-dancing hippos and gators or the marching broomsticks have signed on. Finally, Carrie Underwood is riding shotgun, since asking Jesus to take the wheel. There’s a joke here, I just can’t put my finger on it.
- Whoever wins Season 5, we now know it won’t be Chris Daughtry. Considered the favorite to win the competition, he was ousted in what morning radio jocks are calling a complete shock. I didn’t see his last performance, but I’ve seen prior ones and Daughtry has a strong rock voice that doesn’t have too much promise as a solo artist, but could totally lead a band to airplay.But what if that band leads him?
According to AP, the multi-platinumed Fuel has offered Daughtry their vacant lead singer position, considering Brett Scallions left three months ago. This is WAY better than winning American Idol. Signing with a proven band who has retained their songwriting abilities (the guitarist writes for them, not Scallions), Daughtry will have a much longer career, and avoid having to star as himself in a SpikeTV Original Movie. This is like getting cut from your high school baseball team, only to get a call from the Yankees, who are looking to fill left field due to last night’s injury, and they want you.
Sometimes it’s good to be a Chris and not a Simon.
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