Commercial Success III

2.6 million dollars

Yep, it seems each year it costs another 100k for a company to air their absolute best marketing during the Super Bowl. It seems we didn't make a big deal in the media as we have in the past about the actual cost, but instead spent the week approaching the Big Game talking about commercials that were leaked by their respective companies early.

Bad move. Bad, bad move.

The big news all last week surrounded the Nationwide ad featuring Kevin Federline. Nationwide has done a decent job in the past, including a Number 9 spot on our 2005 list with M.C. Hammer. And this spot absolutely had potential. Good shock value, excellent delivery, and it fits their campaign nicely. However, by letting the world see it three days early killed the shock value. Killed it. It detracted from its ability on the biggest stage, and I'm leaving it off my Top Ten as a result. Hell, Federline actually did something right.

I feel like every morning-after the Super Bowl, the media also decides to declare this year's group of ads to be the Weakest Ever. Maybe we just like superlatives too much - people, it wasn't that bad. Looking at my list from 2005 and 2006, the list I have below is by far the strongest we've had in three years. I don't know what you were all watching. Maybe Phil Simms' awful announcing (a post I may get to later this week) dulled everyone into submission. I laughed at these ads. I lot.

That said here are the Third Annual Awards for the Super Bowl Commercial Offering, or for short, the Commies. (Any resemblance to a fallen economic and political system is unintentional and completely coincidental.)

Top 10 Commies, 2007

1. Doritos - "SpicyCheesyCrunchyBoldSmooth" - This was the best. It wasted little time getting to the punchline (cheesy), and then tacked on two more for good measure. It totally redeems Doritos in my eyes. Until now, they've been known for that spot in the late 90'swith Ali Landry in a laundromat. Maybe we can remember this one as their benchmark. As you might sense, impact humor was kind of a theme this year. (But the woman falling forward into the car door? Awesome.)
2. General Motors - "Suicidal Robot" - Very often, giving human qualities to non-human entities is marketing gold during the Super Bowl. Bud had perfected this with animals, and now GM has done it with machinery. Jasen almost choked on his chili during this one - always a sign of greatness. Way better from GM than their Chevy musical medley of semi-famous people.
3. FedEx - "Names" - Probably one of the few commercials that you had to pay close attention to in order to hear the humor. A group of co-workers are in a conference room, and one guy questions the speed of the slow-sounding FedEx Ground. We then meet his colleagues Harry, Eileen, Joy, and Bob. Shame they couldn't work a character in named Mr. Punchinface. That would have been funny.
4. Career Builder.com - "Promotion Pit" - The second of a very solid trilogy of Career Builder Jungle ads. This one has all of workers in a gladiator-style pit, armed and protected by miscellaneous office equipment. An honorable mention to the one with everybody running - kicked off the campaign nicely. And since they pink-slipped the monkeys this year, the sole primate representation was left to a weak Bud Light ad. But here's the thing with the monkeys - no monkey ad can ever top the 2 mil E-Trade as from '99. So I think we should move on.
5. Bud Light - "Slap You Very Much" - Always the biggest player in the game, Bud will only get two spots on this year's list. It's not because they struggled, I just feel the competition got stronger. (In fact, I have their Hitchhiker-con-Axe and Carlos Mencia spots in the top 14) This one came down to quick editing, and could have used a bigger closing joke to get it higher up the list.
6. Blockbuster - "The Mouse" - Way to bring back and old campaign and put in a new twist. Now Harford has been shliling for Blockbuster over at his blog, and pairing that justification with a funny animated ad featuring rodent cruelty, maybe I'll think about renting there again soon. (Nah - who am I kidding? I'm in the Netflix camp. Hoo-rah.)
7. Bud Light - "Rock Paper Scissors" - Classic Bud, but I saw and LOVED this gag last years during Nextel's Crime-Deterrent ad. So I'll take this opportunity to call out the lost dog Clydesdale ad. It tried to be funny at the end - and this is precisely what it shouldn't do. I want you to open your mouth and sigh, "Awwww." Ok, now while doing that, try and laugh. Hurts, don't it? This is what they tried to make you do. Bad Budweiser.
8. Emerald Nuts - "Robert Goulet" - Weird. And I loved it. Way better than their acronym campaign of the last few years.
9. NFL - "Hard to Say Goodbye" - Reasons I liked this ad: 1) It did not show a single dejected Eagles fan - we're happy with how our season ultimately ended up. 2) It showed a stupid Cowboys fan - who paints a horse, honestly? 3) The Brett Favre closer. WOW.
10. Late Show with David Letterman - "Dave and Oprah" - Jasen actually did choke on his chili for this one. Clever, sharp, and the best in-house commercial on a night where CBS pushed every possible show it airs down your throat. Really, really, excellent.
11. Joseph Stalin